How Rest Helps Eating Disorder Recovery

We had another full house on Tuesday night, and yet again, I am astounded by the wisdom and encouragement that emanate from this group, week to week.

I heard quite a bit around the conversation of being versus doing, that old animal that seems to be such an ongoing challenge for so many of us. Sadly, living in this world just perpetuates that. Our microwave culture of productivity and bottom lines and time-is-money is so pervasive that escaping it is next to impossible. Most of us are over-committed and tend to find ourselves stretched a little too thin. What I heard on Tuesday, though, seemed to resonate of a counter-attack on that very philosophy. It sounds as if several group members are beginning to listen more to their quiet intuition—an inner knowing that whispers ever so faintly, “Rest is okay!” It can be foreign territory, though, because that mindset is so counterintuitive to the eating disorder. The ED, after all, is about doing and running and striving, and it never seems to be satisfied with “enough.” It’s the drill sergeant in our minds that is always yelling to do more, run farther, be better. It’s not very kind, and it certainly doesn’t reward you for contentment.

But rest…Rest is health. Listening to that quiet voice within you that says it’s okay to be. To sit. To enjoy the moment…and then some. And then some more. And, there are a lot of perks that come with the “being”—allowing yourself to own and enjoy a good mood; not taking on others’ negativism as your responsibility; having dessert for its mere pleasure, and with no agenda to “make up for it later.”

We talked some, too, about environment on Tuesday. How places we once knew can trigger old behaviors and coping mechanisms—ED-related and otherwise. The fear around returning, maybe, to where we grew up or an old workplace. Even if, in fact, a lot of success and recovery has ensued since that time in our lives, our bodies hold those memories of familiar places, people, sights and ways of experiencing them. We can be triggered out of nowhere, simply because our senses are reminded of what they used to know. What are some ways, though, we can create and build structure in an old environment and not give in to old habits or ways of relating to it? How can we reformulate these “old normals” and turn them into “new normals?” Some great insight was shared around the table in answer to this question.

Listening to your body is one way of responding. The body is a pretty insightful tool; it clues us in to those “danger” signals and, if we’re listening, it can give us clues and reminders. When we become aware of those cautionary reminders, we are that much more on the alert to remain vigilant. Another defense is to create “new rituals” in that old environment. For instance, maybe your old mode of operation was to arrive at work, head straight to the coffee pot and round the bend towards your cubicle and the barrage of emails which inevitably await in your inbox. Perhaps, though, you might establish a new way of doing things—creating a quiet refuge in your office near a window with plants; pausing in silence before answering the litany of requests; sipping on herbal tea instead of the corporate brew. These are just ideas and may translate differently in your own lives. Begin to ask yourselves, though, “What are some ways I can practice self-care in my own environment? Where can I be intentional about establishing some solace in the midst of chaos?”

Written by Stefani Adair, Volunteer Facilitator