Strength Through Support For Eating Disorder Recovery

We had a full group on Tuesday evening—several of our regular attendees, a returning member, and some new faces, too. I continue to stand in awe of this group process as it unfolds; whether folks have been in one another’s lives for some time or just meeting, there is a commonality that binds every person at the table together. It is true what they say—there is strength in numbers. It can be easy to forget that when we go about the day-to-day, bombarded with to-do’s and shoulds and deadlines and likely encountering a lot of others who just don’t quite get what it means to struggle with an eating disorder. It may feel like crazy-making, for sure!

Which is why support groups like this one are invaluable. Hearing the stories and affirmations and the “I can relate” is what normalizes our struggles—reminds us we are not alone. Indeed, we are not crazy. In fact, we’re not all that different from just about every other person we come into contact with—because we all have our stuff. How we allow that to unfold in our individual lives, though, is unique and may look different from those around us.

One member spoke of her experience out of inpatient treatment—how she feels like she left the ICU, only to enter a playground. How doing recovery out in the real world is such an alien feeling…and how strong those ED voices have been since she entered outpatient. The group echoed encouragement that she is not alone but on the right track…and should not feel that extra, unnecessary pressure of trying to “do recovery perfectly.” There was more talk on Tuesday night about how transitions in our lives can produce a lot of anxiety and reacquaint us with ED behaviors, after perhaps experiencing a considerable reprieve from behaviors. One member, though, found the strength to “halt” in the middle of a particularly painful day and then found herself on the other side, breathing deeply again after feeling like she wasn’t going to make it through. The more practice we get—sitting through those hard places and learning to reach out to others in the midst—the more resilience, I believe, we find in ourselves. It may call to mind thoughts of “Oh yeah, I did this last time; I made it through. I can do it again.” One returning member talked about the freedom she had been experiencing with food since leaving treatment and how her mind has truly shifted—viewing food as nutrients her body needs in order to function and how it’s even an enjoyable process!

Dr. Dorie shared with us some wisdom “from the trenches,” so to speak. She likened the ED thoughts to a minefield. Walking through, scared, those thoughts lie, ready to blow us up. We all know how destructive those thoughts can be; the damage they can do ranges anywhere from extreme injury to ultimate destruction. In lieu of only avoiding or sidestepping them, she said, why not imagine yourselves digging them up, one by one, at the root—destroying that ticking time bomb entirely. Rather than live in fear, coexisting with and trying to avoid those little balls of destruction waiting to go off—get rid of it, altogether. Total recovery and freedom from this disorder is possible.

Written by Stefani Adair, Volunteer Facilitator